The Forum's Favourite Poems

Noah

Well-Known Forumite
And to lower the tone even more

Liquor before beer
In the clear
Beer before liquor
Never sicker

Beer before wine
Your fine
Wine before beer
Oh dear

Beer on cider
Nothing finer
Cider on beer
Makes you feel queer

Whiskey before beer
Never fear
Beer before whiskey
Kind of risky

Gin while you sin
Always win
Rum before you run
Never fun

anon - or no one will own up to it
 

BobClay

Well-Known Forumite
One we used to say at Dartmouth St School (Kingston) back in the early sixties when Mr Jackson was our chemistry teacher: (and I daresay is used for chemistry teachers the world over)

Mr Jackson's gone.
His face we'll see no more.
Cos what he thought, was H2O
Was H2SO4
 

Withnail

Well-Known Forumite
Rhapsody on a Windy Night

Twelve o'clock.
Along the reaches of the street
Held in a lunar synthesis,
Whispering lunar incantations
Dissolve the floors of memory
And all its clear relations,
Its divisions and precisions,
Every street lamp that I pass
Beats like a fatalistic drum,
And through the spaces of the dark
Midnight shakes the memory
As a madman shakes a dead geranium.

Half-past one,
The street lamp sputtered,
The street lamp muttered,
The street lamp said, "Regard that woman
Who hesitates towards you in the light of the door
Which opens on her like a grin.
You see the border of her dress
Is torn and stained with sand,
And you see the corner of her eye
Twists like a crooked pin."

The memory throws up high and dry
A crowd of twisted things;
A twisted branch upon the beach
Eaten smooth, and polished
As if the world gave up
The secret of its skeleton,
Stiff and white.
A broken spring in a factory yard,
Rust that clings to the form that the strength has left
Hard and curled and ready to snap.

Half-past two,
The street lamp said,
"Remark the cat which flattens itself in the gutter,
Slips out its tongue
And devours a morsel of rancid butter."
So the hand of a child, automatic,
Slipped out and pocketed a toy that was running along the quay.
I could see nothing behind that child's eye.
I have seen eyes in the street
Trying to peer through lighted shutters,
And a crab one afternoon in a pool,
An old crab with barnacles on his back,
Gripped the end of a stick which I held him.

Half-past three,
The lamp sputtered,
The lamp muttered in the dark.

The lamp hummed:
"Regard the moon,
La lune ne garde aucune rancune,
She winks a feeble eye,
She smiles into corners.
She smoothes the hair of the grass.
The moon has lost her memory.
A washed-out smallpox cracks her face,
Her hand twists a paper rose,
That smells of dust and old Cologne,
She is alone
With all the old nocturnal smells
That cross and cross across her brain."
The reminiscence comes
Of sunless dry geraniums
And dust in crevices,
Smells of chestnuts in the streets,
And female smells in shuttered rooms,
And cigarettes in corridors
And cocktail smells in bars.

The lamp said,
"Four o'clock,
Here is the number on the door.
Memory!
You have the key,
The little lamp spreads a ring on the stair,
Mount.
The bed is open; the tooth-brush hangs on the wall,
Put your shoes at the door, sleep, prepare for life."

The last twist of the knife.

p. 1917

T. S. ELIOT
 
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John Marwood

I ♥ cryptic crosswords
There's a hole in my neighbourhood
Down which of late
I cannot help but fall
Pot holes
What pot?
No little men dressed in orange here
Pock Holes?
X marks the spot
Dr X Dr Spock
 

Noah

Well-Known Forumite
I must go down to the sea again
To the lonely sea and the sky
I left my shirt & socks there
I wonder if they are dry.
 

age'd parent

50,000th poster!
They say a fart is good for the heart
and gives the body ease,
it warms the bed on a winters night
and suffocates all the fleas.
 

Glam

Mad Cat Woman
Happy St.Georges Day everyone.

Home Thoughts From Abroad.


O, TO be in England
Now that April 's there,
And whoever wakes in England
Sees, some morning, unaware,
That the lowest boughs and the brushwood sheaf
Round the elm-tree bole are in tiny leaf,
While the chaffinch sings on the orchard bough
In England—now!

And after April, when May follows,
And the whitethroat builds, and all the swallows!
Hark, where my blossom'd pear-tree in the hedge
Leans to the field and scatters on the clover
Blossoms and dewdrops—at the bent spray's edge—
That 's the wise thrush; he sings each song twice over,
Lest you should think he never could recapture
The first fine careless rapture!
And though the fields look rough with hoary dew,
All will be gay when noontide wakes anew
The buttercups, the little children's dower
—Far brighter than this gaudy melon-flower!

Robert Browning.
 

Withnail

Well-Known Forumite
Happy St.Georges Day everyone.
The day of Shakespeare's birth, and of his death...

No longer mourn for me when I am dead,
Than you shall hear the surly sullen bell
Give warning to the world that I am fled
From this vile world with vilest worms to dwell:

Nay if you read this line, remember not,
The hand that writ it, for I love you so,
That I in your sweet thoughts would be forgot,
If thinking on me then should make you woe.

O if (I say) you look upon this verse,
When I (perhaps) compounded am with clay,
Do not so much as my poor name rehearse;
But let your love even with my life decay.

Lest the wise world should look into your moan,
And mock you with me after I am gone.

We remember 'the hand that writ it'.
 

Gramaisc

Forum O. G.
Mountfords

(a cornucopia of this and that)

is a man’s world not of testosterone
but of mystery.

The walls ooze an air of
cozy familiarity in
stark contrast to the clinical orderliness of
axe, drill, mattock and saws that,
like all good men,
reciprocate.

Worn with age a bent wood chair,
that no one can recall being sat on,
sits patiently by the counter

behind which, amongst the
jubilee clips and taps and dies,
a smile has taken residence.

“A dozen one and a quarter crosshead tens, please”
draws an instant response and
a knowing finger taps the side of a nose
acknowledging a request for half inch sixes,
“Missus wants more shelves, does she?”
These sorcerers divine your house from your ironmongery.

Flustered by the embarrassment of ignorance
a young mother, sent by her husband no doubt,
buys a, “one of these,” for three pence and
scurries off to the comfort of Costa.

Keys are cut,
wisdom and drain unblocker dispensed,
Stoke’s frailties discussed,
parliament hinges provoke debate over
the relative strengths of
flush, butt and butterfly and
the joys of astro turf celebrated
in this Pandora’s box of
turpentine, roof-felt and rat poison.

John Mills

https://staffordshirepoetlaureate.wordpress.com/the-staffordshire-poetry-collection/
https://staffordshirepoetlaureate.files.wordpress.com/2017/03/john-mills-mountfords.pdf
 

Withnail

Well-Known Forumite
September 1, 1939

I sit in one of the dives
On Fifty-second Street
Uncertain and afraid
As the clever hopes expire
Of a low dishonest decade:
Waves of anger and fear
Circulate over the bright
And darkened lands of the earth,
Obsessing our private lives;
The unmentionable odour of death
Offends the September night.

Accurate scholarship can
Unearth the whole offence
From Luther until now
That has driven a culture mad,
Find what occurred at Linz,
What huge imago made
A psychopathic god:
I and the public know
What all schoolchildren learn,
Those to whom evil is done
Do evil in return.

Exiled Thucydides knew
All that a speech can say
About Democracy,
And what dictators do,
The elderly rubbish they talk
To an apathetic grave;
Analysed all in his book,
The enlightenment driven away,
The habit-forming pain,
Mismanagement and grief:
We must suffer them all again.

Into this neutral air
Where blind skyscrapers use
Their full height to proclaim
The strength of Collective Man,
Each language pours its vain
Competitive excuse:
But who can live for long
In an euphoric dream;
Out of the mirror they stare,
Imperialism’s face
And the international wrong.

Faces along the bar
Cling to their average day:
The lights must never go out,
The music must always play,
All the conventions conspire
To make this fort assume
The furniture of home;
Lest we should see where we are,
Lost in a haunted wood,
Children afraid of the night
Who have never been happy or good.

The windiest militant trash
Important Persons shout
Is not so crude as our wish:
What mad Nijinsky wrote
About Diaghilev
Is true of the normal heart;
For the error bred in the bone
Of each woman and each man
Craves what it cannot have,
Not universal love
But to be loved alone.

From the conservative dark
Into the ethical life
The dense commuters come,
Repeating their morning vow;
“I will be true to the wife,
I’ll concentrate more on my work,"
And helpless governors wake
To resume their compulsory game:
Who can release them now,
Who can reach the deaf,
Who can speak for the dumb?

All I have is a voice
To undo the folded lie,
The romantic lie in the brain
Of the sensual man-in-the-street
And the lie of Authority
Whose buildings grope the sky:
There is no such thing as the State
And no one exists alone;
Hunger allows no choice
To the citizen or the police;
We must love one another or die.

Defenceless under the night
Our world in stupor lies;
Yet, dotted everywhere,
Ironic points of light
Flash out wherever the Just
Exchange their messages:
May I, composed like them
Of Eros and of dust,
Beleaguered by the same
Negation and despair,
Show an affirming flame.

p. 1940

W H AUDEN
 

Gramaisc

Forum O. G.
In which her body was a question-mark

querying her lies; her mouth a ballot-box that bit the hand that fed. Her eyes? They swivelled for a jackpot win. Her heart was a stolen purse;

her rhetoric an empty vicarage, the windows smashed.

Then her feet grew sharp stilettos, awkward.

Then she had balls, believe it.

When she woke,

her nose was bloody, difficult.

The furious young

ran towards her through the fields of wheat.


Carol Ann Duffy.

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2...exclusively-for-the-guardian?CMP=share_btn_fb
 

Withnail

Well-Known Forumite
In which her body was a question-mark
I have been desperately trying to find photographic evidence, of any sort, of exactly this.

It was early in the campaign, that is all i know for sure, and she was talking to a gathering whilst upon a stage?

She appeared to be leaning on some sort of podium or some such structure by her demeanour, and yet as the camera panned in closer it became clear she wasn't leaning on anything. She was just leaning. On nothing.

It arched her stance in the most unnatural way that i have ever seen a person adopt, and on reflection did actually make her look curiously like an actual question-mark.

Luckily i had somebody with me at the time, and we both wondered how an actual person could end up looking like that?

Neither of us have met anybody else in the intervening period that also saw it - we have made something of a 'greeting' based upon it - but perhaps our Laureate did, too?
 

Studio Tan

Well-Known Forumite
Write your own poetry, instantly, out of anything you care to write !

A few years ago I was exchanging email correspondence with a friend and I noticed that, because of some digital glitch or other, her emails weren’t being displayed as text running across the full width of the window. Instead the lines were randomly turned over every few words which made me inclined to read the text with a poetic intonation.

It occurred to me that you can easily give even the most mundane statement a profundity it doesn’t deserve.

How about that quick note left for your spouse ? Why not make it look like E E Cummings wrote it ? You can add to the effect by giving it a pretentious title. For instance :

Lines on making alternative arrangements for the evening meal

Sorry.
I had to go out.
Suddenly.
Your dinner is
In the oven.

Or how about :

Ask for Mick

The garage rang
About your M O T
It failed.
Something about
Play
In the lower trunnion.

You’re to ring and
Ask for Mick.
 
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John Marwood

I ♥ cryptic crosswords
Write your own poetry, instantly, out of anything you care to write !

A few years ago I was exchanging email correspondence with a friend and I noticed that, because of some digital glitch or other, her emails weren’t being displayed as text running across the full width of the window. Instead the lines were randomly turned over every few words which made me inclined to read the text with a poetic intonation.

It occurred to me that you can easily give even the most mundane statement a profundity it doesn’t deserve.

How about that quick note left for your spouse ? Why not make it look like E E Cummings wrote it ? You can add to the effect by giving it a pretentious title. For instance :

Lines on making alternative arrangements for the evening meal

Sorry.
I had to go out.
Suddenly.
Your dinner is
In the oven.

Or how about :

Ask for Mick

The garage rang
About your M O T
It failed.
Something about
Play
In the lower trunnion.

You’re to ring and
Ask for Mick.


THIS

Is how my world looks all the time
 
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