Goldilox
How do I edit this?
That's...umm...open to interpretation.
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2019 General Election
- Thread starter Tilly
- Start date
That's...umm...open to interpretation.
Tilly
Well-Known Forumite
The ******************************* Party
promises new money for old , giant piles of gold leaf toasted teacakes, a champagne tap on every street corner, free parking forever, anywhere , no more taxes, no more dogs in taxis, no more dog taxes, no more texans, a free Sharleen Spiteri with every Texan bar, a bar spitoon for every household , vote now, vote tomorrow, vote twice again on Thursday.
Everyone else is eeeevil
promises new money for old , giant piles of gold leaf toasted teacakes, a champagne tap on every street corner, free parking forever, anywhere , no more taxes, no more dogs in taxis, no more dog taxes, no more texans, a free Sharleen Spiteri with every Texan bar, a bar spitoon for every household , vote now, vote tomorrow, vote twice again on Thursday.
Everyone else is eeeevil
BobClay
Well-Known Forumite
Mikinton
Well-Known Forumite
Not necessarily. There's still all to play for.
Tilly
Well-Known Forumite
Correct
Perrier
Banned
Trust me , I'd never vote for those elitist scumbags in any lifetime let alone this one.
The biggest problem is people think they are there for the average tax paying public , but the truth is theres not many that fit in that 1%.
...for the lowest in society, what use is brexit to them when they are cold, wet and hungry and out on the streets ? *
*Tory mantra dictates it's their own fault for not being able to work
Cue
Well-Known Forumite
People become temporary millionaires during a GE and worry about high tax bands all of a sudden.
Mikinton
Well-Known Forumite
Anyone ever get any canvassers round? Nope? Me neither. I guess I must live in a solid voting area rather than one that might swing either way, so not worth them knocking on my door. Anyway, with it being a winter election, there's been a bit of discussion as to what a canvasser can expect as they approach someone's door.
Philip Cowley @philipjcowley
18h
Let's play a game. This, below, is from young @stephenkb's preface to Sex, Lies and Politics. Most canvassers I know have similar rules/hunches. Let's hear them!
"The timing is throwing up a few new variables this time around. What does a rotting pumpkin outside the front door mean? If the house has Christmas lights up in November how will these deviants vote?" No pumpkins and not even Christmas lights. Just a wreath on the door in December.
"... the bigger the dog the more likely to be Tory with exception for alsatians" Have never had and will never have a dog.
"The rule I originally heard was "small house, big car Tory" , "big house, small car SDP”" Medium house; small/medium cars.
"In my wholly unscientific experience from a couple of weeks ago, the more Halloween decorations, the greater the likelihood of them being Lib Dem." No Halloween decorations.
"during the referendum we found a pretty spot on correlation between Remain voters and houses with solar panels in County Durham." And no solar panels either.
"Take a look at the front garden. If it’s well kept they’re definite voters (the party is harder to call). If there’s an old rusty washing machine they won’t be turning out come polling day." Not an impressive front garden. Just rocks, plants and gravel .... and my daughter's car.
"Caravan = Tory" Nope.
"Brighton Pavilion here. A friend has done a lot of door knocking for the Greens over the years and Bicycle + Plants are usually good indicators they're going to vote for Cazza." No bikes or plants in containers. Not even a hanging basket.
"not the door but the drive. choice of vehicle/s a huge giveaway." Small/medium sized car.
"Lib Dem gardens. Neat lawn, edged with some flowers and well-tended borders. Harder to tell in winter." No lawn or borders.
"As a paper boy I found the stronger the letterbox the worse the Christmas tips. As a canvasser this translates nicely to the more likely a Tory voter." A pretty solid letterbox.
Philip Cowley @philipjcowley
18h
Let's play a game. This, below, is from young @stephenkb's preface to Sex, Lies and Politics. Most canvassers I know have similar rules/hunches. Let's hear them!
"The timing is throwing up a few new variables this time around. What does a rotting pumpkin outside the front door mean? If the house has Christmas lights up in November how will these deviants vote?" No pumpkins and not even Christmas lights. Just a wreath on the door in December.
"... the bigger the dog the more likely to be Tory with exception for alsatians" Have never had and will never have a dog.
"The rule I originally heard was "small house, big car Tory" , "big house, small car SDP”" Medium house; small/medium cars.
"In my wholly unscientific experience from a couple of weeks ago, the more Halloween decorations, the greater the likelihood of them being Lib Dem." No Halloween decorations.
"during the referendum we found a pretty spot on correlation between Remain voters and houses with solar panels in County Durham." And no solar panels either.
"Take a look at the front garden. If it’s well kept they’re definite voters (the party is harder to call). If there’s an old rusty washing machine they won’t be turning out come polling day." Not an impressive front garden. Just rocks, plants and gravel .... and my daughter's car.
"Caravan = Tory" Nope.
"Brighton Pavilion here. A friend has done a lot of door knocking for the Greens over the years and Bicycle + Plants are usually good indicators they're going to vote for Cazza." No bikes or plants in containers. Not even a hanging basket.
"not the door but the drive. choice of vehicle/s a huge giveaway." Small/medium sized car.
"Lib Dem gardens. Neat lawn, edged with some flowers and well-tended borders. Harder to tell in winter." No lawn or borders.
"As a paper boy I found the stronger the letterbox the worse the Christmas tips. As a canvasser this translates nicely to the more likely a Tory voter." A pretty solid letterbox.
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BobClay
Well-Known Forumite
When working for BT I had similar experiences, going in and out of people's houses day in day out. One I remember was the Peartree Estate in Rugely. One house I went into was full of Neanderthals dragging their knuckles on the deck and as far as I could tell, they were burning the doors on the fire in order to cook a Brontosaurus … 
Next door the house was utterly immaculate. I had to drill a hole through the wall and a little old lady was behind me with a dustpan and brush sweeping up the drill debris before it hit the carpet …
I don't know which one scared me more and I'm grateful I didn't have to ask them who they might vote for …
Next door the house was utterly immaculate. I had to drill a hole through the wall and a little old lady was behind me with a dustpan and brush sweeping up the drill debris before it hit the carpet …
I don't know which one scared me more and I'm grateful I didn't have to ask them who they might vote for …
Glam
Mad Cat Woman
That would have been my Mum, except the estate would be the Furlong in Yarnfield. If you finished a cup of tea, the mug was whisked away and washed up before you'd had time savour the last drop. And she always had a damp cloth to hand to wipe away small smudges or non existent finger prints.When working for BT I had similar experiences, going in and out of people's houses day in day out. One I remember was the Peartree Estate in Rugely. One house I went into was full of Neanderthals dragging their knuckles on the deck and as far as I could tell, they were burning the doors on the fire in order to cook a Brontosaurus …
Next door the house was utterly immaculate. I had to drill a hole through the wall and a little old lady was behind me with a dustpan and brush sweeping up the drill debris before it hit the carpet …
I don't know which one scared me more and I'm grateful I didn't have to ask them who they might vote for …
She was a Labour voter.
Cue
Well-Known Forumite
Granted, our own soon-to-be-not MP drives a Nissan Leaf which is certainly not something you’d expect from anyone on the blue side of British politics
Gadget
Well-Known Forumite
My Aunt and Uncle lived on there till I was in my teens. I visited and stayed over many times. It was certainly interesting the variations in locals lol.When working for BT I had similar experiences, going in and out of people's houses day in day out. One I remember was the Peartree Estate in Rugely. One house I went into was full of Neanderthals dragging their knuckles on the deck and as far as I could tell, they were burning the doors on the fire in order to cook a Brontosaurus …
Next door the house was utterly immaculate. I had to drill a hole through the wall and a little old lady was behind me with a dustpan and brush sweeping up the drill debris before it hit the carpet …
I don't know which one scared me more and I'm grateful I didn't have to ask them who they might vote for …
My house would cause a bit of confusion. It's horribly run down, the front garden would benefit from some small explosives and i tend to go over board with the Halloween decorations. However, we always vote and we are Labour supporters.
