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#chaplife
· Burlesque is a polite way of describing stripping by fat student girls.
· No matter how funny something might be it will always be funnier when it happens to a fat person.
· Soft-porn is the most hated thing in existence as both people who like porn and those that hate porn all hate soft-porn.
· No matter how many times you try and deny it, when watching an episode of Corrie you still wouldn't mind seeing Liz McDonald's tits. Go on, admit it.
· When you live in a rural area of France where the average wage is £2 per week, don't buy a Porsche. The locals won't take to you.
· When waiting at traffic lights to cross the road you should press the button over and over. This fools the traffic light into thinking that there are more people wating and the green man will appear faster. FACT.
· No news story that includes the phrase "..and then he turned the gun on himself" will have a happy ending.
· You know you genuinely love someone if you can still shag them after hearing their plops in the toilet.
· The happier someone's myspace page is, the more likely they cry themselves to sleep at night.
This is just page 1 of 43 of helpful tips to help you understand modern life.. check out the full list here:
Holy Moly! Rules of Modern Life
· No matter how funny something might be it will always be funnier when it happens to a fat person.
· Soft-porn is the most hated thing in existence as both people who like porn and those that hate porn all hate soft-porn.
· No matter how many times you try and deny it, when watching an episode of Corrie you still wouldn't mind seeing Liz McDonald's tits. Go on, admit it.
· When you live in a rural area of France where the average wage is £2 per week, don't buy a Porsche. The locals won't take to you.
· When waiting at traffic lights to cross the road you should press the button over and over. This fools the traffic light into thinking that there are more people wating and the green man will appear faster. FACT.
· No news story that includes the phrase "..and then he turned the gun on himself" will have a happy ending.
· You know you genuinely love someone if you can still shag them after hearing their plops in the toilet.
· The happier someone's myspace page is, the more likely they cry themselves to sleep at night.
This is just page 1 of 43 of helpful tips to help you understand modern life.. check out the full list here:
Holy Moly! Rules of Modern Life