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Lidl

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by United57, Oct 18, 2013.

  1. United57

    United57 Well-Known Forumite

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  3. proactive

    proactive Behind you with a big stick!

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    Outstanding. Just brought my office to a standstill amid roars of laughter when I played it over a 40 inch monitor and sound system
    :clap:


    I'll still shop at Lidl, mind.
     
  4. tek-monkey

    tek-monkey wanna see my snake?

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    Half price mince this week ;)
     
  5. littleme

    littleme 250,000th poster!

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    Haha hysterical :)
     
  6. Gramaisc

    Gramaisc Forum O. G.

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    0:47 - "special on my favourite fags"?

    Lidl don't sell tobacco products - nor Aldi.

    I shall be pointing this video out to the staff.

    Excellent.
     
  7. tek-monkey

    tek-monkey wanna see my snake?

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    I did notice that too, but didn't want to be pedantic :p
     
  8. Gramaisc

    Gramaisc Forum O. G.

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    I think that I was actually being specific, I think you'll find.

    I suspect that the 'no tobacco' policy is more about not having a staff member tied to a single product than it is about the health issues associated with tobacco use.
     
  9. proactive

    proactive Behind you with a big stick!

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    [​IMG]
     
  10. Gramaisc

    Gramaisc Forum O. G.

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  11. United57

    United57 Well-Known Forumite

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    Lidl job interview

    Jennifer, a manager at a local Lidl store, had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes she found four people who were equally qualified. Jennifer decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.*

    The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table, Jennifer asked, 'What is the fastest thing you know of?'

    The first man replied, 'A THOUGHT.' It just pops into your head. There's no warning.

    'That's very good!' replied Jennifer. 'And, now you sir?', she asked the second man.

    'Hmmm...let me see 'A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of.'

    'Excellent!' said Jennifer. 'The blink of an eye, that's a very popular cliché for speed.'

    She then turned to the third man, who was contemplating his reply.

    'Well, out at my dad's property, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light on the barn comes on in less than an instant. 'Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of'.

    Jennifer was very impressed with the third answer and thought she had found her man. 'It 's hard to beat the speed of light,' she said.

    Turning to Wally, the fourth and final man, Jennifer posed the same question.

    Old Wally replied, 'After hearing the previous three answers, it's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHOEA.'

    'WHAT !?' said Jennifer, stunned by the response.

    'Oh sure', said Wally. 'You see, the other day I wasn't feeling so good, and I ran for the bathroom, but before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already sh*t myself..'

    Wally is now working at a Lidl near you!
     
  12. Gramaisc

    Gramaisc Forum O. G.

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  13. Gadget

    Gadget Well-Known Forumite

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    Lidle have the mint chocolate advocaat in again, Yum! :pint:They also have Amaretto advocaat in too, also yum :pint:
    543951_712518408758946_913989655_n.jpg
     
  14. tek-monkey

    tek-monkey wanna see my snake?

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    How much? M&S have a baileys style drink with toffee and pecan which sounds interesting, been reduced to £5.99 from about £12.
     
  15. Gadget

    Gadget Well-Known Forumite

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    £7.99 a bottle.
     
  16. John Marwood

    John Marwood I ♥ cryptic crosswords

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    Atom Coated Avatar - Amaretto advocaat

    [​IMG]
     
  17. littleme

    littleme 250,000th poster!

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    ;) Alcohol wins hands down then!
     
  18. Gramaisc

    Gramaisc Forum O. G.

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  19. tek-monkey

    tek-monkey wanna see my snake?

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    I got the beach one a while back but never used it, seemed good quality though. Its currently with my mum, who may be using it on her dining room.
     
  20. Gadget

    Gadget Well-Known Forumite

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    I'd love one but i'm not allowed to paste anything to my walls :(
     
  21. John Marwood

    John Marwood I ♥ cryptic crosswords

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    Always seems to hit 'her' in the eye...........
     
    Sir BoD likes this.

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