Today I Heard.....

littleme

250,000th poster!
You're right @staffordjas
It not only involves much drinking of cider, you are meant to venture out at Midnight on the Summer Solstice whilst wearing a wreath of Ivy round your head, all the while chanting to the Moon God. Dancing round a large Oak tree, It is meant to bring on a good harvest for the coming months.

It can also be used as a fertility dance, this is an evening ritual, it involves sacrificing a soul to the man of fire, while paying homage to the Gods of your ancestors. You have to copulate openly in the fields, teach others of the phallic association of the Maypole, and place toads in the mouths of the ill to cure sore throats.
All the while denying the very existence of the human sacrifice. It culminates in the head of the ''man of fire'' collapsing in flames, revealing the setting sun.
I thought it was much drinking of Lucozade???
 

staffordjas

Well-Known Forumite
You're right @staffordjas
It not only involves much drinking of cider, you are meant to venture out at Midnight on the Summer Solstice whilst wearing a wreath of Ivy round your head, all the while chanting to the Moon God. Dancing round a large Oak tree, It is meant to bring on a good harvest for the coming months.

It can also be used as a fertility dance, this is an evening ritual, it involves sacrificing a soul to the man of fire, while paying homage to the Gods of your ancestors. You have to copulate openly in the fields, teach others of the phallic association of the Maypole, and place toads in the mouths of the ill to cure sore throats.
All the while denying the very existence of the human sacrifice. It culminates in the head of the ''man of fire'' collapsing in flames, revealing the setting sun.
No fields around here, I might get arrested on the beach tonight then .....or maybe hubby's luck isn't in yet again :lol:

I'm doing well on the much drinking of cider though....
 

tek-monkey

wanna see my snake?
You're right @staffordjas
It not only involves much drinking of cider, you are meant to venture out at Midnight on the Summer Solstice whilst wearing a wreath of Ivy round your head, all the while chanting to the Moon God. Dancing round a large Oak tree, It is meant to bring on a good harvest for the coming months.

It can also be used as a fertility dance, this is an evening ritual, it involves sacrificing a soul to the man of fire, while paying homage to the Gods of your ancestors. You have to copulate openly in the fields, teach others of the phallic association of the Maypole, and place toads in the mouths of the ill to cure sore throats.
All the while denying the very existence of the human sacrifice. It culminates in the head of the ''man of fire'' collapsing in flames, revealing the setting sun.
Big thing over here, it's s bank holiday. Everyone gets drunk, and it's traditionally a night it was acceptable for unmarried people to disappear off into the woods together 'looking for fern flowers'.

Also interesting, public transport is free here on public holidays.
 

Gramaisc

Forum O. G.
... a woman describing an item that she had been directed to purchase in a shop. It is very much a man's shop - tools, etc., and it is rare to see an unescorted female in there. She knew she had little chance of finding the item for herself and just went straight to the chap on the counter, describing the item as well as she could.

My attention was drawn by her early use of the word 'bullet', so I listened a bit more intently - other words followed, "wings", "petals", etc, and lots of hand-based descriptive motions. Even so, I had no idea what it was she wanted, but the chap came straight back with a guess.

"An anchor? For a boat?"

"Yes."

"What size do you want?"

They went off to survey the available possibilities and I later saw her carrying one to her car.
anchor-folding-galvanized-umbrella.jpg

At least she didn't want any candles.
 

littleme

250,000th poster!
... a woman describing an item that she had been directed to purchase in a shop. It is very much a man's shop - tools, etc., and it is rare to see an unescorted female in there. She knew she had little chance of finding the item for herself and just went straight to the chap on the counter, describing the item as well as she could.

My attention was drawn by her early use of the word 'bullet', so I listened a bit more intently - other words followed, "wings", "petals", etc, and lots of hand-based descriptive motions. Even so, I had no idea what it was she wanted, but the chap came straight back with a guess.

"An anchor? For a boat?"

"Yes."

"What size do you want?"

They went off to survey the available possibilities and I later saw her carrying one to her car.
anchor-folding-galvanized-umbrella.jpg

At least she didn't want any candles.
Everyone needs 4 candles!
 
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